Friday, August 13, 2004

I was thinking: what am i doing here, in this place, at this moment? Have I lost a sense of what had happened, and what will happen in the future? Have I lost control of this story just because of some foolish passions? Very importantly, do I actually have the desire to regain perspective again, and to walk this path of truth and freedom? Do I really want to? You see, when you fall in love, life becomes complicated again. When you fall deeper into love, and are expected to make a choice in conflict with that love, life becomes impossible. Darker and darker the shadow of doubt looms over your sight, and deeper and deeper, you sink, into that beautiful pool of oblivion. For some moments, you forget that reality is around you. For some moments, you indulge in the temporal and almost ethereal oasis of passion. Where is this story leading to? Does it have an ending? Why have I come here anyway to this space filled with dilemmas?
You see, we now have to go back to the simple idea of hope. The glimmer of hope that reminds us of our dream beyond what we are seeing and feeling presently. If this dream had brought us here, it will bring us further. Hope is a difficult and simple thing at the same time. Hope meets us in our darkest moments, but also in our ecstacy. Our first flirtation with this dream cannot cease here. It has to continue, even if it sometimes defies reason.