Monday, February 20, 2006

let's see

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howard zinn says in one of his writings." The way that society tends to classify us scares me. I am a historian. I don't want to be just a historian, but society puts us into a discipline. Yes, disciplines us: you're a historian, you're a businessman, you're an engineer. You're this or you're that. The first thing someone asks you at a party is " What do you do? " That means, " How are you categorized?"

i think there are a variety of roles we can play in this life, in the society we are in. we are not bound by the characteristics of our profession, our work. i label others, and others do the same to me. we do this in order to get an understanding of who another person is. but it would really be nice if we also free ourselves at the same time from the limits of that definition. then i think we are also free to explore other aspects and dimensions of our personality. it would be a dream life ( for me), to switch from one role to the other and back again, effortlessly, and yet still retain the essence of our identity. it's an ideal to be attained, unless of course one day, i think differently.sometimes, i find it hard to get outside of the mould that i have inadvertently created for myself and therefore, fail to listen to the inner desires to try this or that. i supposed it has something to do with rigidity. once i get comfortable with one "label", i will sometimes think myself crazy for wanting to do things that have little to do with that label.

yet, sometimes, the desire gets so intense that all i really want is to forget about the fixation with definitions and follow that voice. i will see where these desires will lead me and whether i will actually listen to any of them!